Fidel Castro Accuses Team Korea of Pulling a Belichick

Our second favorite Cuban (right behind Ricky Ricardo of course) wrote a nice little essay titled "The Moral Importance of the Baseball Classic".

This essay was written the day before the Cuban national team was eliminated by team Japan, which ended up beating Cuba twice in 3 days. Wait, not just beating - shut them out for 18 innings.

In the essay, the aging dictator rants about the exploitation of athletes by capitalist countries like the United States, and praised the hard work and contributions by the Cubans; he made a point in singling out how the evil American corporations like Major League Baseball have stacked the deck against his Cubans and the Venezuelans.

In essence, the entire essay is just filled with how the forces of evil (the United States) and it's willing allies (Koreans and the Japanese) have ganged up to prevent the people from freely participating in sports and achieve the ultimate goal of athletics, which is health and education.

I know this senile old man is stuck in the 1950's with this rant, but this little gem caught my eye:

"..Korea has invested huge resources in facilities and technologies. On the eve of the last Olympics, when we were forced to adapt to the conditions of a totally different time zone, they treated us splendidly and offered to us, at no cost, their facilities, but at the same time they exhaustively studied every one of our athletes, and took pictures and films of them.

They know every pitching from our pitchers and the reaction by every one of our batters to every pitching. They are the main adversary, because they are also methodical and they bat harder than the Japanese. "

Nice huh? The Koreans were kind enough to let your team use their facilities and you turn around and accused them of cheating. It's pretty clear that Comrade Fidel was hoping that his team would face Japan in the elimination game. Well, he got his wish and didn't work out too well for him. Perhaps soon, he would write an essay accusing the Americans of creating an error-inducing fog that caused the 2 run error by his outfielder Cepeda Frederich.

You think George Steinbrenner and Daniel Snyder are annoying as team owners? They have nothing on this guy.

We'll have to wait another four years now for another chance for Fidel to make excuses for his team's next early exit.

Now a proper sendoff to our brothers in arms in the great struggle of class-conscious proletarians, I give you the English Patient episode of Seinfeld.